Book loyalty

Today I'm a little worried, beause I've just realised that if you're on the old "profile" page, you can see the first paragraph of recent posts.
I don't think my first paragraphs will encourage anyone to click through. But then, I suppose I've never been the kind of blogger to fare well on any kind of competitive measure.

Some people would find this depressing. I'm choosing to interpret it as evidence that I'm kind of cool and Alternative.

So anyway, today I'm writing about book loyalty. That's because even as we speak I ought to be at home, reading Wild Animus so that I can finish it and move on to life-improving books that I've been wanting to read for ever, like Howards' End, The Red Strangers or The Waltzes. I'm about half way through Wild Animus and... well, it's not bad, really. It's not really entertaining either, though. The hero frequently takes LSD, which alienates me, at least, especially as both he and his girlfriend clearly have mental health issues. Maybe I'm struggling with it because they and I have taken opposite attitudes to finding meaning in life: they retreat into a world of hallucination and fantasy, and I try to escape the fog of confusion whenever possible to see the world as it really is.

Given all this, a lot of people would simply throw Wild Animus on the floor and start grooving with E.M Forster. But I suffer- and suffer is the word- with Book Loyalty.

Maybe it's because I read War And Peace a few years ago. To anyone who's thinking of starting that, let me tell you: make sure you can commit to it. You're two thirds of the way through, you're reading about them all going on a hunt for no reason at all... and why? Because in the last twenty chapters or so, it gets amazing. You feel like you really know and love the carachters, and well you should, because you've been living with them for the last six months or so.

That's what worries me. What if I give away Animus, never to know that had I turned over that fateful last page I'd have read a blistering sentance that would change my life forever? In addition, of course, this is an Advance Reading copy, so maybe in a few months time it'll be the biggest hit since Pride and Prejudice, and then I'd look a bit silly.

Maybe it's my respect for the author, or my determination to see the potential in art. Or maybe it's just a lack of courage. I mean, it's not as if I take this attitude to TV, or even films. I have to admit that I respect those people who can just say "This isn't fun. I'm reading something else"- as Gerald Larue said, talking about secular Humanism, "there are no banned books, only those that I consider a waste of my precious time".

So I suppose I'd better get home and get reading. Maybe someday soon I'll put my To Be read list here. It's quite a long one, and I've something less than 12 000 days opportunity to read left.

Song in my head: "Bad Day" by REM